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One Way of Making Lemonade Out of Lemons

What is the juice that comes out when you are squeezed by life? Is it bitter like lemon, sweet like papaya or something else altogether?

Many would say that what comes out is a show of our true character. While it does show us what is inside of us, refraining from judgement can open us up to the opportunity that exists when life gives us a squeeze. Our character can evolve and when viewed with a loving witness rather than judgement we may see a strength we didn’t know existed or perhaps a bit of our shadow.

Either way it is a gift.

An important aspect to notice is if the squeeze disconnected us from the truth of who we really are. Did we do or say something we now regret? Act inconsistent with our values or feel as though we are repeating a pattern? Once disconnected we have no choice but to play a role. A role is reactive and comes from unhealed aspects of ourselves as well as attachments to false beliefs about ourselves or others. The unconscious roles of victim, perpetrator and rescuer are seen as a triad of suffering by Peruvian healers. And it is our attachment and identification to these roles that are the source of our suffering.

Once we identify with a role we think we are something we are not. Our view is tainted and what is less apparent is that if we identify with anyone of these roles then each role is a part of our unconscious pattern. That means if we identify with being a victim then we are also rescuers and perpetrators. Knowing this can motivate us to become aware of and heal the roles with which we identify as most of us would not want to be in the role of perpetrator.

Recognizing and healing these aspects of ourselves frees us to see clearly what is really happening in the moment and helps us stay true to ourselves. In doing so we learn to meet the discomfort of the squeeze and breath through it, ultimately leading to the acceptance of truth, the freedom of choice and the wisdom of right action.

Now that is some good lemonade!


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